Pro tips: 5 Things to do on a First Date That Guarantee a Second Date
So this guy you’ve been messaging back and forth has FINALLY asked you out. You’re so excited, but you suddenly get a little nervous. ‘I haven’t been on a first date in ages, what are we even supposed to talk about? What do I wear? What if…,” Blah blah blah.
First of all, if you’re freaking out about a first date, I’m gonna stop you right there and ask: Have you ever interviewed for a job? If you answered yes, then stop freaking out. That’s basically a first date. Job interviewers just make sure you have certain qualifications, aren’t a serial killer and you’re cool enough that they’d want to grab a beer with you.
That’s literally dating.
You want to make sure your date meets certain qualifications (whether that has to do with personality and/or physical traits), you should try to make sure they aren’t a serial killer (pro tip) and they’re hopefully cool enough to grab a drink with (point of a date, right?).
Boom. Same fucking thing. Except one gets you paid and one get’s you laid…with a few exceptions and blurred edges.
Anyway, now that you’re hopefully feeling a little more chilled out, let’s get move on to first date guidelines.
It’s safe to say I’ve gone on dates. I have a dating blog, so I feel like that’s implied, but I figured I’d say it in case you didn’t notice.
Like with job interviews, once you figure out your style, it’s super easy to know what works and what doesn’t.
At this point, I don’t really feel like I need to actually prepare for a first date anymore like I used to, but that’s because I’ve figured out what works and what doesn’t. However, there are five things I try to always do on my first dates that have shown to be successful.
So let’s get to it, shall we?
1) A little cold shoulder never hurt anyone
No, please don’t be a bitch. But please do show a little skin. First dates are about small tastes. Like an appetizer before the appetizer. So whenever possible, I show my shoulders on first dates. I know it sounds silly, but guys love a little peak of your shoulders and collarbone. And hey, if that’s what they’re telling us, might as well take that freebie and use it to our advantage, right gals?
Please keep in mind it’s an appetizer to the appetizer. AKA show some skin but don’t show some SKIN. You know what I mean.
2) Pick a theme song
When I first started dating after a long-term boyfriend and I broke up, I was nervous. I was out of the game for a while.
I got nervous before each date until something happened and changed that. Coincidentally, every time I drove to a date, the same song would play on Spotify. It became this musical pep talk that calmed the nerves before arriving.
So I started playing the song before each first date for a while until I felt like I had this whole dating thing down. Call it superstition, but this little tradition made me feel so good before each date.
3) Giggles are great
Guys love thinking they’re funny. And most of them are (I’ll never tell the one’s who aren’t). Knowing this, all you have to do is laugh. That’s it. Just fucking laugh.
And although I’m that person who laughs at literally everything, there are strategic laughs to keep in mind. I know, a strategy behind laughing, who am I?
There are two types of laughs I use: one that is an actual laugh, and one that is more like a giggle.
It’s pretty simple. Laugh for real when something is funny. Giggle when you’re flirting.
4) Do your homework
I don’t mean you have to stalk a guy before meeting him. That takes all the fun out of dating. What I mean is to have an idea of what he does or where he’s from before meeting with him.
Because I’m usually going on dates with a couple guys at a time (oops lol), I always check their Tinder profile or Facebook or something right before I meet him. It gives me talking points, questions and a reminder of what we’ve previously talked about before our date.
5) Emergency exit
If you’ve read some of my other posts, you’ve seen me mention exit strategies. I can’t tell you how crucial this is. First, you want to make sure you have a way out if the date is a disaster. I’m pretty comfortable ending a date a little early if it’s not going great, but there are some instances where it seems impossible to just end the date.
If you’re unsure about a guy before the date, mention you have plans later that night or an early morning planned for the next day. That way you can easily excuse yourself from the date gracefully if needed.
Equally as important, if you’re meeting guys out for the first time, please be safe. I know this isn’t the fun side of dating, but it’s important to meet a guy in public for the first time, and I tend to take my dates to select bars where I consistently frequent and even know some of the waiters and bartenders. As someone who meets a lot of guys off apps, I’d much rather be comfortable in an environment I know.
And bonus tip: Have some fucking FUN. Dating is fun. Dating is cool. Take the pressure off yourself and try to enjoy it. I go into every date thinking that it’ll be a good time. And if it isn’t a good time, I at least learned what I don’t like in a guy. Win-win.
The Girl with a Heart on Her Middle Finger