Well, I guess I’m an Asshole

Ok, so I like to think that I’m GENERALLY not an ass. I will openly say that I am not the sweetest most caring human to walk this earth. I think that title could be reserved for essentially anyone before me.

But with this guy, I can assure you I felt like such an asshole. This is one of my most recent stories, so I’m going to take some details out for the sake of everyone involved.

Wayyyy back in the day we used to have a club that held Techno Tuesday every week. It was loads of fun, and my friends and I went religiously.
One particular Tuesday, I met this guy, we made out like kids did back in those days. We also exchanged information.

It was actually awesome because we never tried to hang, but we’d always meet up during concerts or music festivals to say what’s up. Super chill.

We added each other on Snapchat and kept in contact randomly through there.

So a few months ago I went to Tampa for a pirate festival. It’s actually way more fun than it sounds. Actually, a pirate festival sounds pretty fucking cool and it totally was.
So anyway, towards the end of the night, homeboy reaches out to me on Snap and tells me he was also in Tampa.

THINKING IT WOULDN”T HAPPEN, I joked telling him he should come out to the bars. He asked which bar and I shit you not, he said, “Ok, I’ll be there.” And I literally did not believe him. Yes, looking back I understand how maybe that wasn’t the best time for another sarcastic joke. But I created a dating blog for a reason, and it’s mostly because I get myself in really terrible situations, if you haven’t noticed.

Here’s the worst part. Not only did he show up, but HE SHOWED UP ALONE. Guys, I didn’t even know how to handle this solo presence.

But here’s when I realized I’m actually an asshole. He greeted me by my name, asked me details about my life, blah blah blah, the whole thing. Still feeling super uncomfortable, I thought it would be best to push him to meet my friends and see if they would start talking. I turned to an old coworker and said, “Hey! This is my friend…” I realized at that moment that I never knew his name. Ever. Like never ever asked him for even his fucking name in the six or seven years we’ve known each other. Homeboy knew what was going on in my life and I couldn’t even guess the first letter of his name.

And of course, he introduced himself but it was so loud at the bar that I couldn’t hear his name.

Within 30 minutes I was finally able to figure his name out. Didn’t even match his face so that was disappointing.

Either way, the rest of the night he followed my friends and I around as we went from room to room in this bar.

Eventually we parted ways, and I had a chance to reflect on the situation.

To be completely transparent here, I don’t actually care about me not knowing this guy’s name. I actually don’t care at all about this entire situation.
However, what I did realize is that sometimes I can actually be a dick, and that actually does bother me. Mostly because there’s no real reason to be a dick to someone if they don’t actually deserve it.

Is it something I can work on? Absolutely. And maybe I could TRY to tone down my sarcastic jokes that literally always get me in trouble. But realistically speaking, that will probably happen the day I decide that wine isn’t one of the world’s greatest creations. AKA, don’t count on it.

So, I’ll leave you with this:

Everyone has room for improvement. Take a second to reflect on previous relationships, hookups, random makeouts with strangers you’ll never see again, and think, “Is there a chance that I could’ve been a less shittier person in this situation?”

If the answer is no then hit me up because you, my friend, are a saint.

 

Love,

The Girl With a Heart on Her Middle Finger

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